07/11/2020

Nina

Hello, welcome to my blog. This is the post in which I say who I am. I could start by saying my name is Nina, I live in North Shropshire with my loving husband and 2 beautiful children. I am an ex-librarian with a degree in English. In my spare time I enjoy pole dancing, and spending time in nature with my family. These things are all true, but none of them say who I really am in relation to my art and creativity. Now, I don’t want to tell you my life story, you probably don’t have time, but if i can give you a sense of where I’m coming from them maybe I’ll feel this post has done its job.


From a young age I was aware of an intense and constant urge to create. I spent a large proportion of my childhood drawing, painting, writing or curled up alone with a book for inspiration. For various reasons I struggled socially and emotionally but the need to create and release that came afterwards grounded me, I was hooked on creating and soon settled on art as my chosen career path.


I feel it necessary at this point to mention my obsession with colour - something that has also been with me since childhood. For me, bright colours evoke what I can only describe as ecstatic joy. Sometimes I sit staring at combinations of colours and shapes basking in the joy they give me.


My battles with mental health intensified with my parents divorce when i was 17. I stayed firm in my goal to study art at University and, despite turning to excessive drinking and partying for emotional release (Manchester in the lates 90s was party central), I landed myself a spot on a fine art degree.


My mental health in shatters, I was not prepared for the harsh critique of the Fine Art lecturers, some of which was far too personal and would not be allowed today, thank goodness. I switched to an English degree at the end of my first year, and I rolled all my disappointment and hurt into a big black ball and swallowed it.


I spent years unable to paint. I worked in a conventional job in a library. I slowly forgot who i was. Meanwhile the big black ball ate away at my insides.


Finally, after having children, I realised I was in a mental health crisis. It’s been long bumpy road but, after a number of years, I am starting to rebuild myself. I started painting again just under a year ago, and the release is wonderful. My current goal is to be unashamedly me, without needing validation.


So you see, in conclusion, my art for me is about an intense and constant need to create, an obsession with bright colours, and a constant battle with mental health.

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